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SPECIAL FEATURE • TAKE MY COMPUTER PLEASE

by Steve Ciarcia

Retro-Humor, Ciarcia Style

Sometimes I like to think back to when all this computer stuff was still fun. That was before I had to make a living at it, before all the dot bombs, and before everything became so serious that using the words computer and humor became inappropriate in the same sentence. I assure you that there was a time before all this weighty significance concerning computers. For me it was 1977. I was working as an engineer for Control Data Corporation. Back then of course, microcomputers were still considered a novelty. They definitely didnıt interest a big computer company like Control Data and were actually considered a negative if you even brought up the matter. Any personal interest in the subject had to be kept low key, bordering on secret. That was of course until I started publishing articles in a magazine called BYTE. That really blew the lid off.

While I am known best for many years of straight hardware design presentations, my earliest BYTE articles were laced with humor and stories describing the whys and whatfors associated with my monthly creations. One particular BYTE article in April 1977 went beyond that premise and described my life at Control Data when friends found out that I had a computer (the computer I had back then was a Digital Group 8080/Z80 but it was every bit as powerful for its time as the newest P4 today). In short, I became involved in a computer gambling scheme that made me a lot older and a lot wiser.

The article in question, called Having A Private Affair, starts by saying, "The following is story is true. The names have been changed to protect the innocent but frankly, there arenıt anyı." The adventure described in the article was indeed true and became the catalyst for a book about that and other early computing exploits called, Take My Computer, Please, published by Scelbi Computing in 1977.

Over the years, a number of readers have asked about those early humorous stories. Thereıs this first one about trying to beat Jai-alai, but the one most people remember is when I tried breaking into my own computer-controlled security system. The stories range from absolutely true to total fabrication. Universally, they serve up a smorgasbord of the naiveté and wonder of that technical age. It certainly all felt true as I wrote them.

As you might expect, Take My Computer Please and BYTE are long out of print. However, because so many people have asked about these stories, for nostalgia sake I decided to resurrect them. Retro-computing buffs and computer fossils like me who actually owned an early microcomputer might get a kick out of reading them again. When you do read it, just put yourself back in1977!

April 2001

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