After the hype...

by Darren Ashby

Gilligan revealed
"I've always wanted a combination toaster-mop," says reporter Bret Neener-neener of the KRSP 'Krispy' News Radio. "Now I don't have to worry about those pesky bread crumbs that crumble off my toast when I butter it. With the Tastey-Clean™, the mop is always handy when you are making toast... and bread crumbs." (The reporter flashes a smirky grin.)
For those of you that don't get Krispy News, we are breaking the story today that generated so much hype a while back. Quirky inventor Darren Ashby revealed project 'Gilligan' (now known as Tastey-Clean™) today. Alan Blah-blah and Robert Yada-yada, two principle investors, were unavailable for comment as Darren showed the invention to the press. Developed at a cost of $10,000, this revolutionary kitchen appliance is expected to spur the fastest growing kitchen appliance company ever. The product sports a hefty price tag with consumer versions (hopefully) targeted to reach $1000 later this year. Apparently, the fledgling company has already started to "clean up" so to speak, as they have sold the first 100 units to government facilities known to be full of hungry personnel that we need to clean up after. These won't be as cheap as the consumer version. Due to the industrial strength cleaning requirements, these units will cost taxpayers over $5000 each.ⁱ
When Bret asked about the new "mop," Ashby became a bit miffed. He is adamant that this is not a mop, but a kitchen hygiene device, or KiDingⁱⁱ for short. It is the first device that really combines cleaning and cooking, he says.

'It' is revealed

All has finally been revealed regarding "Ginger." Those that speculated it was a scooter are correct. Dean Kamen might argue that. He really wants you to call it a personal transportation device. In today's world, to be successful you need an acronym. So I will coin the term PTD (short for scooter). Call that my contribution to changing the world.

After extensive study (I read a couple of articles and looked at a picture), I have come to the conclusion that this is not anywhere near a revolutionary, world-changing event. It is still a scooter. It gets you from point A to point B with you standing on it. So, what is so amazing about this device? Well, it balances, and it will allow you to cover more ground and be more productive, says www.segway.com. (Turns out they already have their own acronym, HT for Human Transport. I refuse to succumb, however, and will use PTD unit the end of this column!)

Highlights... and disappointments

Some articles claim you get 2 hours of riding for every hour you charge it. Too bad this isn't true; it would help it be more revolutionary. The truth is, you can go up to 15 miles on a full charge at 12 mph. That is a little under an hour and a half. But it takes 6 hours to recharge the battery. Compared to other scooters, these are decent specs, but also compares to a $400 price tag, too. It would have been a lot cooler to me if it had a better power source: maybe a fuel cell or MEG, something that would have given it some real range. But alas, you just get plain old batteries.

It balances for you. I haven't had a chance to ride one, but I bet this is pretty cool. By the same token, though, I have ridden a plain old model with the wheels front to back and it is pretty fun in its own right. I think it is fun because you have to balance. Ironic, isn't it?

They say that some day we, the consumer, will be able to buy this for just $3000. This is a great savings over the $8000 price tag we taxpayers will have to cough up for mail carriers and cops to use it. The question is, why would I do that when I could get something that takes me just as far for $400?

Several people have stated we will build cities around it. I say we will have to build cities around it to make it as useful as it is hyped to be. Just think of it this way: either you go 6 miles and come back, or you go 12 miles, wait 6 hours, and then come back. It will suffer in the US for the same reason all electric vehicles have suffered here. It has a limited range. It ought to sell well in Europe and some large cities, though. But again, if that is the case, why wouldn't plain ole' regular scooters do equally well? They should do even better because they cost significantly less.

As the wheel turns...

The PTD is the birth-child of awhile back when everyone was dot.com-ing and the Internet was the next moneymaking frontier. As such a child, it was hyped well beyond the realityⁱⁱⁱ. The question is, will it really live up to expectations? I can truly say, I hope so, but I doubt it. One thing is sure though, all this hype will help the current electric vehicle market from scooters to cars, and that is a good thing.

What will we see in the future? A knock off from China that has a third hidden wheel? Or maybe Segway will put a docking port for your PDA in your PTD. (Then the rich boys that can afford this thing will be able to check their email on the way to work.) I'll bet the lawyers are licking their chops on the suits this thing is capable of. I mean that. Even if it functions perfectly, there is a lot of legal opportunity here.

I don't know about you, but I was pretty disappointed. Of course, Star Wars Episode 1 was a bit of a letdown, too. The only thing I really know for sure is: If you hype it, they might come.

----------------------------

ⁱ Apparently former President Bill Clinton secretly used a prototype to clean up after himself when he was in office. It seemed to work well, as he got that second term. Rumor is Gary Condit is on the waiting list for the next prototype.

ⁱⁱ Sound it out, then you will get it. :)

ⁱⁱⁱ I think reality is a little closer to this link that was sent to me.

Product Engineering Archive

Guides and Experts Analog Avenue EDA Tools PLD DSP EDA Embedded Systems Power Test


		Click here to get your listing up.